And after letting God contribute to my blog, ("Thanks big fella, now piss off and hassle Satan.") I'll get back to what prompted His appearance.
This is a "meme" started by Tom over at his excellent blog, Dubito Ergo Sum:
List at least four things that you'd do if you were God. Assume the same thing I did: you're omnipotent (do the logically impossible!) and whatever you do will work out fine with the laws of physics, such as they are.
And here they are for me:
1. Flying: Flying is way cool. I'd let everyone fly. Why should Angels have all the fun?
2. Publicly dack everyone who deserved it. Current candidates would be Fred Phelps, George W Bush, Britney Spears and the Spice Girls.
3. Change Hell to rehabilitation for all. Really, when you think about it, does an eternity of suffering really fit the crime? Can anyone really do anything this heinous? And can their behaviour be repaired so that they can live a good life in Heaven?
4. Do all sorts of cool stuff with no responsibility. And why not? I'd be God. Frightening pensioners with well placed lightning bolts easily outdoes whoopee cushions.
So yeah. That's it for me.
I'll leave this tag open to my normal readers to have a crack at - but read Tom's blog. He had a better go at it than what I did.
10 comments:
Did you read that previous post? He stole your "beer volcano" idea! Is nothing sacred?
"He stole your "beer volcano" idea!"
Sue the bastard!
"Frightening pensioners with well placed lightning bolts easily outdoes whoopee cushions."
Well, that all depends on who sits on the whoopee cushion and what they've been smoking. The Pope, maybe?
I did it for the lulz.
He stole your "beer volcano" idea!
I have a bit of an inkling that that's not the first thing that He's stolen, Plonka.
Sue the bastard!
Ah, but then I'd be the one stealing the idea, Bob.
Well, that all depends on who sits on the whoopee cushion and what they've been smoking. The Pope, maybe?
Good point.
"Ah, but then I'd be the one stealing the idea, Bob."
Touché.
I'd have only one thing to do if I was God. Scrap the lot and start over.
Nobody need worry about that happening though. If I was God, I wouldn't exist ;)
Romulus, howdy, and thanks for popping in.
That's harsh, but probably a fair assessment. If God did put everything together, he really did do a ordinary job.
If I was God, I wouldn't exist ;)
That's cheating. I don't think that you can get away with this as an answer.
Well it worked for the Urban Spaceman ;)
Okay then, - one, create myself.
Two, create Man. Watch him suffocate in empty space, scratch my chin and think 'Hmm, something's missing.'
Three, create beer to help me think.
Four, create a big soft chair to think in.
That's all, I think.
Good work, Romulus.
And the big soft chair was a nice touch. I can personally vouch for this one.
I'm getting to all these rather late (though I read them quite some time ago), but I definitely like the Hell-as-rehabilitation idea. It's one of the things that led me out of theism--what purpose is served by eternal imprisonment with no chance of parole?
Also, flying=teh Awesome.
Thanks Tom. I always hated the eternity in hell thing, although knowing the Old Testament God, it was hardly so very surprising. The guy was such a douche.
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